Thursday, June 26, 2008

Sad angel !

Well, my name means an just adding some apt adjective to go along with it !
Its June 26th, 2008 ! Though there is nothing great about this day, i wanna pen down of how my normal day went !
Today - for a change - yes, very much for a change, i got up early in the morning, went out for a walk at 7 am with health conscious friends ! ( Yeah, wherever it puts me ! ) Did burn a few calories , i was sweating after a long long time, and then came home to see the India vs Pak match - Asia Cup 08.
Well, we won ! You can say - this was the most goodie part of the day ! Sehwag played like there's no tommorow..his sky kissing sixes were a treat for the eye ! I really enjoyed watching the match. Thanks to the awesome internet @ usa !
And then, i made upma for lunch. was the worst thing i could ever make ! This was my second attempt (must say futile) in making upma...and again i failed. I think i let it uncooked and just turn off the burner...dono, but promise, i wont ever try again making this upma, unless until my mom is standing on my head :)
And then, the usual - entering the world of music - and application process.
A whole new world- all by self one can say - playing the songs that cheer me up, take me to a new world ... blah blah blah ... blah blah blah ....
So i applied to like 30 -40 companies today, there were a few of the openings which i actual felt were totally apt for me !! ( 1/10 times i always feel that this particular opening is apt for me !) So , the optimist side of mine is making me believe i will certainly get some positive mails tomorrow..and the pessimist part is sighing and shrieking with a loud "Nooooooo!!"
So as it said...tomorrow is another day ... jo aaj nahi hua woh kal zarrooor ho sakta hain !
C'mon i need such noble thoughts to survive ... each day is a battle of me within myself !
I dont have to lose faith ... may be at this very stage of my life , i am realizing what an important word FAITH is !
hmm...As they say, adversities maketh a man ! In my case , it will be a woman ! ( sad try ! )
I am trying not to let loneliness engulf me, i am trying not to lose it all...i am trying not to be sad... you know the devdas kinds ... the loser kinds !
I am trying ........
And to add to all this , ( yeah the twist in the tale) .... my friend S !
Well, my best friend S was gonna come back within my communication circle , after her week long trip to some place in india. When she left , we had some bitter argument regarding my off late mood swings and my bad manners to talk to i mail her one lonnnnng explanation mail when she is gone !
And guess what, its like one entire day that she has spent at work , she did read my mail ... and HASNT EVEN BOTHERED TO REPLY ... or for that matter even communicate with me any way ! one call..sms !
How damn long does it take !
Yeah, it kinda irks me...a lot actually !
I am really really disappointed in her ... she frustrates me till no end....and even then, after every fight, every argument , i feel , believe it is cos of me .. that all the bad things between us happen !
sigh ... i dono what to expect or not to expect outta anyone...
For that matter, even if its ur best friend , dont expect anything from anyone ....

Sad angel that i am , or i have become .... its difficult to end this post on a sad note !
But hey, india won :) so cheers to that !

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