Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Dream !

I have always lived with this fear, where a day comes when I don't see clear dreams ! Good dreams! Achievable dreams ! I would wanna call that day, the day I lose everything ! I faintly remember the phrase which says that you can take away everything from me, but not the attitude to which I behave under the given circumstances ! One's dreams, one's power to imagine...the vastness of which is unlimited and not conditional under any circumstances - its the endlessness of happiness that I see in dreams that excite me! And for me dreams are not always something that are seen with shut eyes. I see them live. It keeps and makes me happy. And I (who doesn't) like the concept of being happy!

Life's been weird these days - never did confusions feel so good - so bad - at the same time. Never did living in the moment make so much sense in one moment - no sense in the other. Never did a feeling feel so right - so wrong - in one breath. Never did uncertainties scare me and excite me this much. Is it a dream that I am living? Or is it a mere faux-pas phase of life, where I dream and dream ... aware or unaware of the fact that my days are my dreams and nights extension of them?

I used to always think that the worst time in my life would be when i would stop dreaming. Pushing me out from my mundane life. But i realise there is something even worse. I have been working without retrospection for the past few months in alien conditions. I dont know where I am heading, what am I looking forward to! What are the things in life currently that could or would truly excite me? But in this little rare moment of retrospection, i realise i have outdone or increased my worst fear. What have i become? A slave of my dream.

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