Let's blame it on the social media...

Have not blogged since ages. Nope, nope...not because I did not have something to write about or things to share...or suffered from a difficulty to bare...

It is just that I got hooked on social media.

The small thoughts. The one-line jokes. The serious inspiring stories or the wonderful pictures that were aiding to weave stories --- they all clubbed together in the web of social media.

Most thoughts are finding way to that medium and dear blog is left unattended.

Let me revive some thoughts...let me stir up some stories. Let's hope I write something on this over the weekend!

And then there was June 2012...

What a day! What a day to end this hectic, chaotic, and yet sweet, if the optimist me, can say...
What all I did...

- Saw so many movies. Right from Vicky donor, Rowdy Rathore, Avengers, Shanghai, Madagascar 3, Prosthemeus .
- Read so many books. Goodreads says I read 5. Of all, I remember reading Scars by Cheryl Rainfield.
- Got completely drenched in the rains, twice. I never carry an umbrella on days when it is sunny when I leave my place. But Mumbai rains being what they are, always come at the unpredicatable hours.
- Once again visited the hospital. Prayed for the ailing parent. Cursed the supermighty, if there is one.
- Worked from home for the last week or so; love the office people for being co-operative during times of distress.
- Realized I am too weak to let go off certain things.
- Realized that I am too stubborn, and in matters of mind over heart, I listen to my heart, way too too much.
- Bought nothing worth writing down.
- Finalized the new Android phone that I am gonna buy next month, pakka.
- Tried two new chinese joints, a lebanese joint in and around Mumbai.
- Came across a few good blogs; plan on reading them regularly.
- Got an opportunity to write more.
- Contemplated a hair cut, for like twice a week. Damn, I cut my hair once every 3 months; I am not sure how good or bad it is!
- Coloured my hair - like streaks...nothing new in this one!
- Explained to co-travellers what Kindle is, and how I am reading a book in it! 5 times in a local train!
- Finalized and cancelled a trip to Goa/Bangkok/Ladakh. My life is too unpredictable to plan things in advance :-(
- Stumbled upon and read a few things I should not have read. Being ignorant was bliss. Now that I know, I cannot rest in peace.The knowledge keeps hovering around like an unwanted mosquitoe.
- People told me, for the umpteenth time, how I am too much of a worrier. Seriously? How about we keep the person you love the most in a hospital and then take away all other loved ones away from you? How would you feel? Worried?
- Got some nice positive cleaning done at home.
- Lived alone for a week or so, after almost 2 years!
- Lost a close relative. And realized how immune of sorts I have become to death.
- Donated some money. Tried, in vain, to find a few organisations helping specially abled child. And in the process of this search, me and a friend came across a few scams in the so-called prestigious NGOs. Tsk tsk.
- Successfully pushed back a few decisions for next month. :-)
- Just realized next month starts tomorrow; so might have to think hard, and probably take some tough decisions soon.
- Cried, a little.
- Laughed a bit
- Worried a LOT.
- Dreamt, a lot.

Happenings

So many things to do...so little time...
So, I wanna blog often and update the dear page regularly...but I ain't doing that.
Too much chaotic work days, a very very busy personal life, people coming in with long over due notices, people moving out with the blink of an eye!
I have been away for a while now, missed putting my points in perspective.
I celebrated my birthday in style, missed ranting about things that I missed out on and displaying the array of gifts I received.
Too much happening professionally; not the right time or place to rant about it.
Too little happening with too much of force personally; planning to rant about it soon :)
The sibling is here :) With her around I can't even imagine how life moves on without her around!!
I have been attending hour and day long talking sessions...(read: conferences); they amuse me for a few hours and then I get back to a blank state. But I love the few hours that it keeps me at the edge of my seat :) I can't even wait for the speaker to tell "Questions?!" I simply jump with joy :) I have always have had so many...though I do end up blushing and making a fool by asking some cheesey ones.
I ended my association with the library that I had joined :( Yes, I do not HAVE TIME to read. :( Only good thing is, this shall give me time to pick up the unread books lying at home. Cos technically, I can't keep self away from books for long. However, on an altogether different note, these books might be academic ones with some new developments :D

That's it for now.
I have been tweeting regularly now, and I just wonder why did I keep self away from there for so long. It is engaging. And fun. I missed it.

Its been very long since I posted.
I do not remember when I had taken this long a break from posting.
There have been times when I am constructively deciding about de-constructing this blog. Do not know why.
But I wish to erase the slate. And start afresh.
I do not wish to analyze life, things, and the general works.
I wish to live as it is.
My blog ain't all about analysing. But when I sit and write, when I build up a post in my mind/mobile...yes, I am analysing things. In general.
I am not gonna do that.
Not any more.

I particularly do not target a single entity/reason why this thought, change.
May be I will get back to square one, and just be self.
But as of now, since the past one month or so, yes -- I am not looking into things. Or analysing my past, present or future. I am just living it.
Letting things be.
Living life, the beautiful way :)

Off late

* I have been busy, with work, with bonuses, with happiness, with lingering sadness, and trying to maintain what I have recently read in the "The Secret"
* I am not even posting posts in my mind. In other words, it would mean my mind is never that idle that I am thinking of incidents around me, I am not in any analytical mode. I am just being there. In the present.
* I am really scared of people with multiple-personality disorder (No, don't google, its not a known term) But I maintain, that they do accept the fact that they suffer from it. They just can't be "one" with everyone. They need definitions of "me" Its weird. I better stay away. But sometimes, just sometimes, I wish I could switch off things as easily as they do!
* The Tiger has roared once again in Mumbai. What seems to be a good movie, might attract some extra crowd due to the recent happenings in Mumbai. Its really ironic that at this very time, I am reading Maximum City! I read those lines, those things about riots, about political parties, and it seems to me as if the whole book was like written yesterday. Funny part is, many of the leaders mentioned in the book, have so changed their political parties by now ! Such is the state...the city, my mumbai!
* Many of my friends are getting married. No, nothing new. Its real fun when I catch up with my friends in USA after a long gap and get to know who's going around with whom and who's getting married, engaged and all the gupshups!! Some real weird beans are spilled about the bean town I knew! My best friend getting married, really really makes me feel old :( A tad too old at times! I wonder why...
* Marriages, bring people (read friends) either come closer or move them apart. My sibling's friend is getting married at around the same time as my best friends. I am suffering from the latter problem, my sis is cherishing a newly found proximity!
* Many a times I am trying to be happy. Trying not to read in between lines. Trying not to fuss over things, as small as a spilled cup of coffee on my shirt before a meeting. It takes a lot of effort to maintain that "dignity"! Trying to be a cheerful self after work. Amidst work. Amidst the social group you belong to. Amidst the elderly gents and aunts whom you see at the end of the week, just cos you have to see them. Amidst the plight of travelling in buses in Mumbai. Amidst the sweat and farty odours that the roads emit. Amidst a nosy boss and selfish colleagues. Amidst the things that you lack and things that you can/will never have. Amidst the vaccum that you feel within. Amidst missing 'mom' pangs! Ailing self, long bills, wrong relations, wrong attitudes, and the list would just go on...
And then suddenly, one day, one moment, one incident. The lid blows off. The pressure that was created within, was sadly well insulated. It was there. It hadn't evaporated.
And then I realize, how easy it is to just loose. Not to take control of anything in your life. Just flow with your anger and emotions. It doesn't take long to do it. You do not even have to try too hard. It just happens.
And yet, you love to tread on the difficult path. A path that would take efforts. In the end, you see yourself and the surrounding happy.
And betcha, there's nothing beating that!!

Occupied!

Things that are keeping me one:

- I came back from a refreshing trip to Gujrat/Rajasthan last week.
- Highlight of the trip was definitely the visit to "Diu". Beaches out there were awesome, so neat. So clean. Will post the pics once I upload them. Secondly, it was a good unknowingly family gettogether. None of us knew we would be landing at the same place, at the same time. And there we were. Being with your uncles, aunts and cousins is always so much fun. You can connect to them, by things much more than the blood. I once again realized how great a family I have. Which stands by me, in good as well as bad times :) And being the youngest girl in the family, definitely has its advantage :)

- I am so proud to say that I have finally started using my Wii Fit :) Yes, I have been doing it since I have come back and as of now, I have lost some countable pounds :) My target is little too far as of now, but the fact that I am on my way is exciting. The lazy being that I am, never would have joined a gym and then would have regretted each day of joining it and not going later. Thank you Wii Fit !! My own gym at home :)

- I am the usual busy at work. Learning tips from sis about "How to survive at a demanding work place" are coming handy, daily.

- I wore pink nail polish this weekend :) Never done before!

- I intend to go for a hair cut, soon!

- I love travelling with the umpteen number of thoughts in my mind. Some sense of peace prevails within, and I often catch myself smiling for no good reason.

- Yesterday, I cried for no reason!!! Call me crazy, call me weird, but the whole incident was nasty. While returning from work, I took an auto and bang...I started. I cried and cried. Called "S". But nothing worked. Called V, did not pick up. I did not know how to stop! I did not know what evoked that outburst? Monotonous, this life is getting? I guess.... But luckily I was all fine by the time I reached home and had some wonderful dinner that dad had got. :) Food never fails ;)

- I love to see the smile on kids face when I give them food.

- I like kids, but off late I have observed that not as much as I used to. Hmm....

- I am looking forward to make a shopping list. Nah, not to shop but to tell what all to get for me :) heehawww ! !

- I do not like being timid and tiny at times. At times, those times, are quite often :X

- It rained in Mumbai. In November. All I could sing was cold november rain. The way those drops of water make a hazy picture on my window. How I miss holding hands and walking on the beach with that someone! Sigh, I love rains!

A few things...

I do not blog these days.

Call it a writer's block or a non-efficient way to handly my schedule.

This new job (eh!!) is killing me, and touching each sector of my life - magnificently.

Yesterday, while talking to a colleague about this, he told me - just do it. Do things, do not let work stop you from doing stuff that you have always done! In other words, he has decided " to not let work bother other things in his life!"

That was a good inspiration I must say.

Today when I entered, I had decided to do "3 things" other than work!

1 - Look out for a new "Wii" game ( Not done!)

2- Blog !! ( Did!! :))

3- Talk to my bank (some bill - jhol :( - not done!!)

But it feels good to know that I am thinking about things other than work, and dong something !!

:)

I hope am here, for a longer time, and often!!

Prolly , I also do not want everybody here to know that I blog. Yes, I wish I were anonymous at times.

This page is my personal diary kinds. I do not wish to mix work and pleasure :) I do not wish my collegues to know a lot about me, you know , personally. How I crib, how I cry, how a bad day makes me curse, how I curse !! Several of such things!

I do not know whether I will ever share my blog link with anyone. I read their blogs and I feel like commenting, but I resist somehow. Since, my Id would become visible.

Am I scared ?? I just do not know what's the term, you know!!

In other things - you know what's weird.

Loving someone on monday ( no not that!!)

Hating someone on tuesday ( VERY NORMAL)

But loving someone else on wednesday ( YES dude, I find it very very weird)

And *sigh* I know PEOPLE who do that, have been doing that. Is that some disease or something like that.

???

Also,
I am glad to inform that I have taken up/resumed my reading habits.
I finally finished like some 4 books in the past 1 month :)
I will write about them soon.
And I have been catching each and every "good" movie these weeks.

So there have been things other than work, you know. Its just that I am not getting time to sit back and notice them. The wheel's moving a tad too fast !

Also, I found my "threee months" lost orange lip balm today, so hurray :)

And, I am on a leave for four days during Diwali , so another hurray :)

And yeah, I want a nobel prize too...don't I work/write/do things - quietly ?? Think about it . I am loud , but that's just to be heard by the world !

Ha !!

Be back soon :)

:) :) :)

So what's keeping me busy these days?? Bday after-effects!!

(That's the cake I had cut in office)

It had been a heelluva bday !!! Which was some weeks ago, and am still peeling off the effects. Had this awesome picnic for 2 days right after my birthday. And also this cake cutting thingie that continued till tuesday, 4 days after bday :)

Gifts, which are synonmous to birthdays, includes a FOSSIL :) white one :)
Am soo in love with it ....



But the moment/breath/heart stealer is definitely the white suave sexy gaming console, that is lying there .... at home :)

YES I AM THE PROUD OWNER OF A NINTENDO WII !!!!!!!!!

My wish list is just getting shorter by the day, and I can't be more happy about it !!!

WII WII WII !! Here I come....

Random thoughts

Weekend was fun... I got my first *Diamond* - sob sob, missed mom seeing the moment !

Wondering that ...

• A friend said this while discussing his love life...

--> Do not spit. It causes TB!!
So, do not sleep. It causes you to dream?
Do not love, cos it hurts?

• Ever wondered how inhuman some doctors are? A lady doc who was called in during some emergency check up, never even once asked...how is the patient after being taken in the ambulance...Huh, soulless !

• Fights with "S" are increasing by the day.

Some calls. Some messages later. We just conclude the same thing ... it's not working the way we want it to work. We both are fed up of fighting and moving on each time.
Some day, the "kind of over" would really be over?

• I hate posting from work.

There's always a fear that the HUGE 17" LCD screen would be visible, from some or the other corner, and there would be someone peeping in...
Not that, I write unreadable stuff, but its just that ...its too personal.

That gets me thinking! I can not GET personal with acquaintances, but with strangers, yes yes, I can and I am !!

Strange?

• Met 'doc' hmm...she has lost terribly. She looks more pale, more thin, more not like a doc. Deep within I am worried about her weight. Would never voice it out though, her mom's voice is enough :)
  
• How many times in this life time am I gonna realize that the world is a small-small place? There have been so many instances that I have lost count. And each time I feel this would be it, bang comes another case. AT times, I just get scared so as to when would this person know some person, I do not want him to know....

Blah.......

Hello...
Not many things to write...more things to crib....Don't like to fill this space with cribs and rants, all the while..hence came the break. Not to mention the work load at work increased, friends piled up over the weekends and daily chores during the week. The few good movies that I saw were ok, the only refreshing thing was - Caramel Popcorn :) Naah, even the company was ok.

Realized that :

- I like the 'time-less-ness' feeling that I get, when I talk to or meet certain friends. It makes me feel that I am surrounded by people who wishes to be with me !

- Sometimes the words you say very randomly are so harsh, that hurt lives for a long long time.

- It just takes one fight to end a relationship, several times I have observed this.

- BB got married last week :) I am soo happy for him. I realized there lies a good soul deep within...the happiness that I felt within when I saw him on that stage, made me feel like literally jump with joy :) I feel good when I feel good for people. Sigh, it happens so less often....

- N is getting married next month. I am happy for her that she will finally settle down with something stable !! Yeah, she needed that....

- Thoughts of marriage evoke certain thoughts in this idle mind...I do not want that....

- Good friend A went for her MBA. Telling that good bye was difficult, since her frame of mind wasn't strong. I wished she were more positive ... and I am soo glad she went for that GOA trip , alone :)

- I sooo like people smiling !! I like people who smile cutely :) Aaaaww goes my heart.....

- Wish I had more than words to express the unspoken words ( If that makes sense!!)

- Wish V was more outspoken. Sometimes I want things to be more than emotionally attached...

Hello !!

Hello...so am finally bloggin at the media that i wanted to like since the past couple of years
I liked blogspot due to many reasons...whenever i used to read a blog in here , i used to damn myself for making accounts at other site for blogging ! ( I have 2 othr accounts but the page kind of sucks in each !)
But today finally,( i dont know why today) !!! i m doin it !
Hurray !!!!
I love bloggging and hope to maintain this one too....... rest stuff laters.......
bbye...